Unavailable for an intimate connection

First you were available
Now I don't sense that anymore
I wanted to meet you in your fullness
And it feels I received a close door
I wanted to meet your Heart
You let me in
But now I sense you put up the armour

First you walked slowly towards me
And for a short while you ran into my embrace
And now I feel you run away
From intimacy
From your fear of intimacy
and fear of loss

And I understand your heart is not ready
It is okay
I will embrace my disappointments

And be with my sadness and grief
Based on expectations not based in Reality
I want to embrace Life as it is now

Heart-available for meeting me as she
meets me now

I am grateful for what we had
For the wisdom you taught me in
meeting me and not-meeting me
The feelings that were awoke in me
My Heart's tender response 

For the beautiful emotional intimacy we shared

Teaching me to be with myself in uncertainty
And to cherish Love when she shows up in Her beauty

She shows up
She disappears - seemingly
She changes form
Changes season
She is always there
Always Here
She hides below expectations
She is closer than your breath
She is underneath your judgments

She is always waiting
For you to show up
To Life's gentle invitation

/Anders Branderud, 31/12-2015

Poem, Heart Openness

In Heart and in vulnerability 

It is here my Heart flourishes
And is nourished
And joyfully sings her beautiful song

Here in the fertile ground
In the rich and allowing soil

Here I can grow and flower
In divine space and pace
In my Beloveds' gaze
and her warm embraceIn her tender nest
and loving and accepting chest
In the warmth, care and beauty
Of the art in her Heart

An intimate white layer of pure and shining snow
Snow flakes dancing with joy in the air
Softly falling
In evening glory
Celebrating a miracle story
Of Heart's attuned
singing a beautiful duet 

Anders Branderud, 27/12

Poem, Gentle strokes of the Heart

It is not about labels
It is about how deep can we meet
How many layers are protecting
our Essence and Heart

Can we meet naked
Soul to Soul
Heart to Heart
In Authenticity and Vulnerability
Intimately
Heart Essence
touching skin of Heart in tender sensitivity
Without hiding

Eye-gazing into the
infinte Forest of Essence
Landscape of amazing textures and colours

Can you be available
to be with me in Essence
To Grow
and Flow
With the Ebbs and Tides
Ups and Lows
In bright sunshine
In heavy storms, thunder and rain
In Exquisite beauty and deeply felt pain

Heart supporting Heart
Being and Seeing
Souls united
in Intimate soulship
Heartship
Walking soul beside soul
Sole beside sole
Barefeet
In the mysterious and wonderous
forest Path
In the Magical Land of Essence
And the Ordinary Extraordinary Land of Everyday Life

Grounded on Earth
Hearts united in Heart-Soul-land
In all Simplicity and Magic
Hands holding
Hearts unfolding
Jumping and playing with joy and spontaneity
Exploring, discovering in innocent curiosity

27/12-2015, Anders Branderud

(Photo from some magical place on the internet)

Poem, Inner playful child

I am rediscovering
The innocent little child of mine
The spontaneous, happy and playfuly boy
Worriless and full of lightness
Adventerous and warm
Joyfully exploring the world
In lightness and curiousity

Welcome to play with me
I embrace your light and your delight

Anders Branderud, 25/12-2015

Poem, Healing and Loving bird

There is a bird in my Heart

She sings magical songs
So tender, so beautiful and warm
With beauty, magic and love
Tenderness and vulnerable power

She sings Love Songs
In unison with the birds
In the trees
And the soft gentle breeze

There is a tender bird in my Heart
She sings Healing Songs
Of Tenderness and Caressing Love
Her words is Offering Healing
To the wounds of weary and courageous souls

Her melody is gently caressing and
tendering the weary journeyer
On her courageous Heart path

The beautiful bird in me sees the beautiful bird in you
Namaste

-----
One more poem

This longing to be light and free
Singing songs of freedom in Harmony
Sharing and spreading Love
To every living Being
Through tender words and Presence
Receiving and deeply Seeing

Poem: Oh beautiful bird

Oh beautiful bird
Who day and night sings your Love
To God and to all Living Beings
Your celebrate Creation
You are a miracle
Singing of all wonders and miracles

You sing without worries
And you share your glorious joy
Thanks dear bird for sharing
Your Wonders and joy

Anders Branderud, 25/12-2015

Poem, The Beauty within your Heart

May you discover the beauty within
And may the answers and the questions
dance a Heart dance
and shine forth with clarity

May your inner child play with joy
And find her nourishment in the
curiousity of the simplicity and
worrilessness of a moment fresh
from burdens and worries of the past

May you find inner delight in your inner light
May you find yourself
Your true expression
Discover your roots, and ground;
and fresh and pure soil to thrive and to grow

And to feel at ease
and embrace Life's flow
And when you are feeling low
To Heartfully know
And to see and feel your
Unchanging Divine Beauty within
Your pure and sacred Soul and Heart
Is there like a Radiant Pearl
Waiting for you to dive
Deep within the Ocean of your Sacred Soul
To explore the Infinte Depths of Your Inner Treasure

The beauty
The Pure Crystalline Diamond Beauty
Is there under labels and self-judgments
She is always there
And she is shining her bright light
Everything is perfectly okay
She is shining forth bright and radiant
And she will be recognized and seen
The more you dare to fully let go
And trust your Essence within will unfold
In her infinite and always unfolding Beauty

Everything is okay
And she is patiently waiting
Like a loving, non-judgmental and embracing Mother
Who is Loving and Receiving without Taking
She gives abundantly without demands
Respectfully with respect of your borders
And she is patiently waiting
Attuning to your space and pace
With her Unconditional Love
For your Heart to unfold in
Her divine timing, pace and space

Poem Anders Branderud,24/12-2015
(Photos below from Unknown).

Poem, Healing Heart words to a friend

Dear beautiful, tired soul

With a Tender, soft Heart of shining gold

May you rest and behold

Watch Your beauty unfold

The birds are singing

Healing songs to you

And the wind is whispering
Songs of Love in your ear

May you find inner peace and stillness

And rest in your breath and your heart

Dear courageous and beautiful warrior

Peace warrior

May you just live
In simplicity and be

Be happy and free

May you find deep rest

In your gentle chest

And joyful loving art

In your tender heart

May you immerse Yourself

And delight

In glorious light
On your courageous

Heart path

Let your Heart soar

With a Glorious roar

On Eagle wings

Of Beauty and Love

(Photo unknown; from a beautiful soul on the internet)

Poem Anders Branderud, 23/12-2015

Poem, Inherent Beauty and Value

There is an inherent value and worth in me and in you
Regardless of what the inner critic says
or people we meet recognize.

And I want to meet this Inner Beauty
Glowing like the Radiant Sun
Shining like the brightest star
Rhythmically Pulsating Her Love and Light
Sharing her Wide and soft
Tender embrace
Lighter than the burning lightening
Like the Dazzling Wondrous Sun
Spreading her rays to every living being
Reflecting Her light in every snowflake
Mysteriously Warming the Depths of every longing soul
Deeper than the deepest ocean
And with a Fullness fuller than words can recount.
And only Wide Open Heart can sense

Soul-Core connecting with the soul of the Sun
Deeply unfolding her Intimate Heart secrets
Opening up to a vulnerable and transparent Pace and space

Your Inherent Value and Worth
Is Bright and shining like the
Strong Sun in Zenith
Your Beauty knows no Limit
And the mirror can only show a fragment of your
Wholesome and Luminous Beauty

Your Light is Shining Bright
If you only could relax into your Heart and Being
Your True Beautiful Essence would unfold in Her Glory And Brightness

Your Inherent Beauty and Value
Shines Brighter than the Sun
It is a Hidden Treasure on the Inside
Just waiting to be discovered and valued

The Heavens is full of galaxies, stars, miracles and wonders
And all this Magnificence is just a Reflection
Of the dazzling, glorious Beauty of
Your Heart and Being

So dearest Beloved,
Seek not approval in vanity
And your recognition, worth and value in objects or others approval
Go deep within
Dig deep inside
And find the Inherent Beauty of your Divine Glorious Diamond Essence

She awaits there patiently for you
Like a Lover with a Burning Heart Longing for her Beloved
Longing to Unite and Be One
In Sacred Undivided Heart-Soul-Intimacy

Anders Branderud, 21/12-2015

A Heart adventure of the courageous soul

Magical light under

Starbright delight

On an adventure
A Heart adventure

Departing from the safe lands of conformance

Lying outside gazing at the stars

Tindering and guiding our long and sometimes arduous journey

No ropes and obligations pushing us back

Other than the familiar sense of our conformance-abode

Here in the midst of the deepest depth of forest mystery

Home of magical fairies, elves, pighugs

Princes, dwarfs, lions and other magical beings

Lies the land of the adventurous souls who have acted upon their courage

Here dwells the courageous soul

Who have listened to her hearts and dreams

And started the Heart’s journey

The Heart-quest, the Heart-adventure

Here journeys brave souls who are tired to conform to someone else’s truth

Who are willing to take the risk and cost of journey with an authentic heart and being

They are walking in different paces

Treading with different weights in their emotional luggage

And wounds from their quest

The mystical being lays under the bright star filled sky

Sensing her tender and gentle heart

Wide open to the magic of Life

And lies deeply at rest with an awareness of the surroundings and her perils

The peril of losing herself and her purpose

Of letting the frustration, loss, pain and sorrow

To extinguish her inner fire

Of losing touch with her Inner Guide
Inner Light, Inner Guidance.

The Guiding Star

Shining Her bright and gentle Light inside

Giving Joy and Light, Meaning and Value to Life

Openness and Dynamism of a Wide Open Vibrant Heart

Courageous and beautiful woman of valor

A poem I wrote to a dear friend. Read it and let the words speak to your beautiful soul:

Courageous and beautiful woman of valor
Who struggles and persists

I see your deep commitment to your purpose
To live life fully and authentically
You being a gardener tenderly sowing seeds and watering the ground
And transforming her into the Garden of Eden
A wise gardener removing critical and limiting weeds with childhood roots not serving you anymore

I see a hero riding into the land of the unknown
Riding up and down the hills lightly, smoothly
And effortlessly like the wind
Tenderly caressing and speaking the beautiful language of your horse friend
Under the rainbow and the stars
The rainbow and the stars resembles the wildness
Vitality, aliveness and colorfulness of your being

And I sense and feel the wounds you got on your heart journey
And Your courage to open up, and to be vulnerable
To share and receive words and touch of healing

And the angels watch over your beautiful soul
And protect you on your path
Angel wings are covering you

I see your courage to listen to yourself and to follow your heart’s pace
And to give her a safe space to grow and flow
I see your divinity and your ragged human stumbling
And the beautiful soul you are
In all your expressions

I see a mystical poet whose heart pours out words of exquisite beauty and depth

And I send you this blessing on your brave journey
May safe tears water your tender heart
May the seeds of healing blossom in the fertile soil-soul
Of your vulnerable, tender and open heart.
May your soft, and fragrant sensitivity give her nourishment to grow

May angel souls, kindred spirits, pixies, mystical beings, elves and heart friends be with you
Protect you and give you oxygen, shade and sunlight to grow and flow
So you may bloom and flower into a majestic grounded tree of healing
Available and providing healing and love, tenderness and wisdom
To all living beings under the sun

Healing of seeing your own beauty

Healing of seeing your own beauty

See the beauty in yourself.

The uniqueness

Unique colours and textures

Drawing a masterpiece on the white canvas

Splendour

Magnificence

Inner beauty

Expressing herself

As Heart unfolds in Her beauty

As she is gently unwrapped

Layer after layer

With tender and caring hands

Finger tips touching with tenderness

/Anders Branderud, december 2015

Poem, Rain of Tears

Beloved Heart,
Can you hold me
Do you love me as I am
Can you hold my weaknesses
Can you bear my tears
This sensitivity opens up
And feel deeper
Beneath the storyline “I am rejected”
“I am not worthy”
Feeling the vulnerable sensitivity of
And Heart Open to the shifts of Life

Allowing tears that have been repressed in the past
To pour forth
And express their infinite wisdom

May the Sun shine Her beautiful countenance upon you
May Her wings give you shade and protection
May she guide your way
Home to the Heart
May her Radiant rays
Melt the layers of ice
You built in the past to protect your Precious Heart
Melt into Rivers of Life

Rain of tears slowly fades away
And the colorful rainbow appears in the horizon
Integrating the tears in her luminous beauty
May my Heart unfold Her true potential
To hold all Seasons of Life

/Anders Branderud, 29/11-2015 (stillnesspoems.blogspot.com )

Poesi, Dansa livets dans med tillförsikt

Med glädjefyllda poetiska skutt
Vandrar jag långsamt på livets väg
Mina fötter bär mig
Känner jordens fasthet och grundande
Vandrar i tillförsikt
Om Livets nådhet och godhet

Solens ljuvliga strålar värmer mitt ansikte
Känner vindens kalla bris
Ömt smeka min kind
Njuter av Livet
Av ögonblicket
Av mitt andetag
Livets vatten porlar från hennes rika källa.

Det finns inga måsten och inga krav
Bara varande i Livets hav

Anders Branderud, November 2015

Det här är en fin artikel om val och om tillförsikt:
http://elisabethlabbaci.se/om-att-valja

Poem, Sun resting her gentle countenance

To my dear Heart,

And I sit here in gratitude

And I hear your soft whispers
In the sun resting her gentle countenance in

the white layers of frosty meadows

Reflecting the lightness of your love filled immersion

And I feel your Aliveness

In my burning Heart

And I sense your gentle touch
In the tall grass slowly dancing

To the rhythm of your quiet breath

And I hear your peacefully calling Inside

And I respond to your silent invitation

Softly, gently

Heartening
Heart opening
I bow down to your wise wisdom

Your amazing graze

Your deep and endless embrace

Your loving and gentle graze

Your soft and tender Face

Speechless I stand in gratitude
In solitude I bow down to you

And thank you deeply for the
Precious gift you have given me

This precious gift of Life

I carry a Gift in my Heart

A gift to share and impart

A gift to love forward

And inward and upward

Delightful grace

/Anders Branderud, November 2015 (Poem and photo)

Poem, Mother's womb

In my Heart
I can be like a child
Lying in Her mother's womb
Heart protects me
She nourishes me


Another poem:
Listening to the Wind
Letting her take me where she wants to go
Being an attuned leaf
Listening to how Her breath moves me
Tuning in to how the blood pulsates through my veins

One more poem:
O du vackra vita duva
O du vackra vita svan
Du praktfulla skapelse
Levnadsglad seglar du fram
På skvalpande böljor
Vinden bär dig när du elegant
Sträcker dina vingar
Leder dig när du låter dig bäras utan motstånd

Anders Branderud,November 2015 (photo, poem)

Poem, Attune to my Heart

A raw Longing of Connection
Heart meeting Heart
Soul meeting Soul
Connecting deeply with the Whole
Loving, touching and tender Heart
Beats gently and softly
Heart feels Aliveness
So close, so close

My whole Being is Longing to be
So real, so real
With every cell
To Her inner Core
Express what I deeply feel
To be true
To be Authentic
To be Real
To always be True to Myself
To Listen and Attune to my Heart

Anders Branderud, November, 2015 (Poem and photo)

Poem, Like a tender crescent moon

In the deep and dark twilight night
With sparkling twinkling stars so bright
With shining moon full of longing
and stars dancing around
Celebrating the Beauty and Mystery of Life

You are like a beautiful rose
Like a tender crescent moon
Openly sharing your light with everyone

When I behold the moon's reflection in your eyes
I am overwhelmed by beauty surrounded by beauty

My Heart is singing a Song of
Depth, Yearning and Longing
Yearning to Meet
To be present with
To resonate with
To deeply connect with
For Two Hearts Uniting in Complete Intimacy
For Mystery and Magic of Life

Anders Branderud, 6 november (Poem and photo)

Poem, Sing your own song

Sing your own song
Sing it with your own authentic voice
Dance your own expression
Dance freely without shame or guilt
Express your uniqueness
There is only you who are you
Give of Yourself
Celebrate and Live who You are

Don’t let your inner critic and outer critic stop you
From Your Inner Rose To Flourish and Flower
In all Her Magnificent Beauty and Power

Allow your Heart to be Wild
And your Journey to be full of
Adventure, Joy, Curiosity and Freedom

Embrace Yourself as You are
Be Kind to yourself with your strengths and flaws
With your raw vulnerabilities and Tender Heart

And you will see Magic
Unfold in your Heart and Being
And the Depth of your Heart will
Unfold and Express Her Own
Unique and Beautiful Dance

/Anders Branderud

And the teachings of the book Soul Without Shame: Soul without Shame: A Guide to Liberating Yourself from the Judge Within, is are very helpful for my heart’s unfoldment; and may resonate with you and help you on your journey.
I wish you love and freedom, Anders

Poetical reflections about intimate relationship, intimacy and loss

Poetical reflections about intimate relationship, intimacy and loss

I feel that in an intimate partnership relationship I would allow my partner

All freedom to express herself

To be The Beautiful Spirit she is

To grow in her Heart’s pace and space

To allow her Inner Rose to flourish in all her fragrances, colors and forms

To be with her expressions of her wildness, silence, grief and despair

Doubt, fear, anger, pain, Love, gratitude, separation and intimacy

To allow her richness, colors, forms, fragrances and depth of her Being to unfold

Provide a Loving and Accepting Space where she can Express her Wild Heart and roar

Where she in freedom can Dance her Heart’s unique dance

And join the moon, Sun and the stars

In their Luminous Free and Sparkling Dance

And if she would feel her calling to leave our Dance

And depart from our attuned, sacred and intimate Union

I would release her

And wish her well on her glorious and adventurous journey

And the Love and the connection

The fragrance, flavors, flowers and touch

The beauty, richness and intimacy

The Longing and Warmth of Heart would stay in my Heart

And maybe feelings of abandonment, rejection, grief and Loss would appear

Like children who wants to be sensed, felt, heard and hearted by my Heart

And I would embrace my Heart
And try to be with Her and embrace Her and Love her

And feel with Her and be so close to Her

And provide Her a Loving and Accepting Space

And gently Listen to her Pace

And tenderly Look into Her Gentle Gaze

Telling me Lovingly that Everything is Okay

I would hear her tender and warm whisper

That She is Vast as the Wide Ocean

And that the Universe is just a Refection

Of her Infinite Depth and Being

And that I never lost my Heart’s Beloved

Because in Heart there is no distance

In Heart there is no Loss

And Love changes colors and shapes, forms and fragrances

In all Her Infinite and Loving expressions

The Heart holds and Loves all the canvases, shapes and colors on the drawing of Life

I would feel the pain that was triggered from the losses of my Life that I had not been ready to be with until now

That my Heart protected me from in her Infinite Kindness and Love

And I would whisper to her:
I want to feel it now

I am ready to be with you in all your pain
I love you and I want to be with you – always

I want to be with you in Everything that you go through

I am not looking for a narcissistic love

I want to sacredly love you

Like the Holy Rose you are

Feel the beauty of You

Passionately feel you in all your fragrances

Lovingly be with not only Your softness and sensitivity

But also the thorns

And explore the Mystery and the Beauty

Dive into the mystery and find out that

They all are embraced by your Deep Love

And to rest in Your vastness

In midst of both Intensity and Silence

I would feel my Beloved Heart’s Loving embrace

Her warmth stroking all my body

Firmly and gently holding me

Providing a soft and safe space for the weary, adventurous and daring journeyer 

/Anders Branderud, 2015-11-17

The Heart moves in her own pace

A poem from my heart (that was penned down this beautiful night while I was writing to a dear friend):
The Heart moves in her own pace
And opens up in her own space
And we listen and attune to her soft beat
and give her time and space to unfold
And as we learn to more deeply accept her 
And attune to her pace and her gentle beat
And love her with a deep embrace
Touching, caressing and kissing her gently
She opens up
She blossoms

And we feel her tender fragrance
We sense the presence of a beautiful rose
And her vulnerable love
And attune to her sensitive whisper

Photo, poem, Anders Branderud, 2015-11-13

Poem - Meet You in the Ocean’s - In the Souls’ Depth

O, beautiful flowery woman

You are so beautiful

Your presence gives my heart happiness

You adorn reality in all her dazzling colors

You paint the celestial vaults in beauteous shades of loveliness

You shine from inside and out with your beautiful soul

You are immeasurably precious

Your heart’s vulnerability and tenderness

Your beautiful, gentle and open embrace

Your endless deep eyes that speak of your soul’s depth and her width

Your mouth tells about your playfulness and sensuality

The corners of your mouth tells about your spontaneous happiness

Your hands tells about your gentleness

When you touch me I feel your sensitivity and kindness

My body and my heart is vibrating in pace with yours

And our heart’s tones are playing a heavenly song in consonance

Your inner treasure is so rich

Your flowering and welcoming heart deeply touches my heart

My heart wants to unite and be one with your heart

A longing so palpable and deep

To be so close

To unite in a deep love

I am standing on the sand shore

And gazing out towards the horizon of the ocean

And I am breathing out my longing into the ocean breeze’s peaceful breath

My longing travels along waves and storm

And is embraced by the Ocean’s Depth

Here Souls’ Longing meet Each Other and unites in the Soul’s Depth

Here Hearts meet each other

Here borders and conflicts are erased

Hearts unite in Unity

In the Meeting of the Heart’s there is No Distance
Only Deep and Limitless Love

My Heart speaks out

I meet You in the Ocean’s - In the Souls’ Depth

-----

På svenska:

O du vackra blomsterflicka

Du är så fin

Din närhet skänker mitt hjärta lycka

Du smyckar verkligheten i all dess bländande färger

Du målar himlavalven i fagra nyanser av skönhet

Du lyser inifrån och ut med din vackra själ

Du är oändligt dyrbar

Ditt hjärtas sårbarhet och ömhet

Din varma, varsamma, öppna famn

Dina oändligt djupa ögon - som vittnar om din själs vidd och djup

Din mun som vittnar om din lekfullhet och sensualitet

Dina mungipor som vittnar om din spontanta glädje

Dina händer som berättar om din varsamhet

När du berör mig får jag känna din känslighet och omtänksamhet

Min kropp och mitt hjärta vibrerar i takt med ditt

Och våra hjärtans toner spelar en ljuvlig sång i samklang

Din inre skatt är så rik

Ditt blomstrande och välkomnande hjärta.

Mitt hjärta vill förena sig och vara ett med ditt hjärta

En längtan så påtaglig och djupt

Att vara så nära

Att förenas i en djup kärlek

Jag står på sandstranden
Och blickar ut mot oceanens horisont

Och andas ut min längtan i oceanbrisens fridfulla pustningar

Min längtan färdas längs vågor och storm

Och omfamnas av Oceanens Djup

Där Själars längtan möter varandra och förenas i Själens Djup

Där hjärtan möter varandra

Där gränser och konflikter suddas ut

Hjärtan förenas i Enhet

För i Hjärtans möte finns inga avstånd

Endast djup och gränsläs kärlek

Min längtan talar ut

Möter dig i Oceanens - I Själarnas Djup