Poem, Heartbreak, Heart-opening

I wanted to protect myself from heartbreak.
To just push away all the uncomfortable feelings and pain.
To move on
Forget.
I did put on some armour
Played out a role.
Played to be approved.
Played to be loved.
Played in order to avoid being rejected.
This seemed to work for a while.
Existence wanted otherwise.

Deep heartbreak.
Tears rushing down my cheeks
Body shaking
For a moment giving up
Facades dropping away

For a moment
Totally wide open
Accepting what I feel
Open to the rejection of someone else
Being embraced by Existence
May seem like a contradiction
That you understand and deeply feel you are all accepted
when you in the Moment accept the rejection by someone else.

I did put on this thick layers of armour
To protect myself from becoming hurt.
To protect myself from pain
Protect myself from becoming rejected
Hindering me to really feel the
Soft Breeze
To Really Experience Life in the Moment

Always had this insecurity
Fear of that others may hurt me
Fear and mistrust of Existence
Now when armour is dropped
I find out that Existence is embracing me
Touching me gently.
There is nothing to fear.
Just rest and trust
And dare to let go off your armour.
The armour that is sheilding your heart from Life
That is pushing away Life from connecting with your Heart.

/Anders Branderud, 31/12-2014

Poem, Armour shielding heart falls off

Completely touched
Heart meeting heart
Hearts uniting in unity
Feeling this deep love inside.
Heart pulsating love.
Looking deep into loving eyes.
Finding self within
Finding love within.

Whatever blocked this deep meeting
Just fades away in this openness.

Armour shielding heart falls off
A vulnerable heart is exposed to existence.
Heartbeat after hearbeat
Life is flowing
Running in the veins
All without effort.

Poem, Christmas

It is Christmas night
This beautiful delight
Bright shining light.
Lighting up the outside
Do we let the light of Life/Existence light up our inside?
To uncover and shine upon our dusty corners

Decorations outside in trees, stores and homes
And decorations on our Being inside. On our Inner Home.
Decorations to hide what we really feel?

Giving of gifts
Selfless love or
Seeking of approval?
Playing different roles
In this theatre of Life

Under the Christmas wrappings
Under the many layers of covers and masks
That we have wrapped our soul in
Hiding
Not daring to open up

Celebrating Christmas but not letting others open up the
Neatly wrapped Package of our soul

The truest Christmas gift
The Gift of Life
Receive this gift from existence
A Meeting where we allow ourselves to remove the layers covering
The depths of our Being
Where we allow a Deep meeting to take place
Where soul connects with soul
Instead of a facade connecting with a facade

Christmas
Cold outside
Let the Sun of Existence
Melt the frozen layers
Of attachments and  identities
Covering your ever pulsating
Vibrantly Alive Heart

A true Christmas gift
The gift that Existence offers in every Moment.
Embrace this gift
Embrace this Moment

Poem, Playful

In the midst of the light waters

In the midst of the raging sea

In the midst of the deep stillness

There is a place for you and me

Swimming

Floating

Flowing

Playing Abounding

Beautiful abundance

A rich treasure

Poem, Sand castle

Like a sand castle in the sand
Elaborate, magnificent
It took years of hard labour to build up this castle.
Put in alot of effort and suffering in building this castle.
Castle of ego structures
Ornamented
Layers of protection to protect from the outer surroundings.
Heart Armour to protect from feeling the inner sorroundings.
This seemingly harsh and harmful reality called Life

And one day there is this realisation that this castle is the root of my suffering
I am missing Life in my attempt to protect myself.
Life is Love and I am trying to protect myself from Love.
The very thing that I am searching for.

Putting down the spade.
Stopping to put effort into this elaborate castle building.
The wind, the rain and other weather phenomena is slowly making it weaker
And there is no effort to build up what it tears down

Feeling vulnerable and naked.
When the wind is blowing
Seemingly mercilessly, but yet filled with grace to its very core
Hitting directly to my very core.

Shaking
Shaping
Sharing
The gift of being all vulnerable and open.
Stopping to play the game of hiding.

Poem, A deep meeting of love

Deep meeting

It makes me feel so alive

It is so completely nourishing...

So fulfilling

So deeply touching Heart cries out of joy

Oh the joy

Oh the satisfaction of this connection.

Flying on a cloud.
So,so,so touched.
Like an inner deep wave
Inner tsunami of wellbeing
Feeling it's core

Feeling the waves hit the shore

And gently spread out.
A smooth and gently touch
Touching both the finegrained stones and the rough neglected stones

Welcoming and embracing of every expression

Seeing. 
The unique value and potential of everyone.
Waves bringing stones back into the deep blue ocean.
Ocean of Love

Ocean of Life

The forming place
Where the rough edges of ego falls away
And, the true core of Being can shine.

Shine like the sun sharing her beautiful expression with everyone

Generously sharing her love and truth.
Opening and touching hearts
Melting snow and ice of hearts covered in layers of protection armour.

This deep relaxation

Warm embracing inner movement
So deeply touching..
Positively overwhelming.
Inner waves of deep silence
Of Extreme wellbeing

Waves of deep, deep relaxation.

All so nourishing
Revitalising the whole being.
Touching the very core 
Healing
Transforming.
Opening up

For the River of life to flow

Flow. Through this Whole being
Without any blockades

This deep meeting is like a poem.
Effortlessly flowing
Connecting heart to heart

Depth to depth

Hearts dancing

Embracing moment by moment

Movement by movement

Lost in the dance

Lost in the wonder of Life

Lost in total fascination

Amazement

Wonder

Of how a deep meeting with another

Can bring you into the very Core

Intimacy of Being

/Anders Branderud

Poem, A boat anchored to a safe harbour

What am I desiring.

What am I wanting

To be deeply embraced

To feel I am safe

To feel I am loved

To feel I am home


To be A boat anchored to a safe harbour

Embraced and loved by THE deep blue ocean

Caressed and cared for by the Soft breeze

Loved and shone upon by the warming sun

Gently looked upon and watched over by the moon.

Embraced by all surrounding, shining stars.


Being a resting place for the birds

Being anchored to the firm ground of Existence.

A meeting place for deep meetings.

A meeting place in midst of the raging storm

In the midst of waves of stillness and tranquillity.

To be open and sensitive


To Flow in stillness

To Flow with all waves

To receive it all

Fully accepting

Not judging.

Poem, Healing child within

A warm embrace

A very touching meeting

Healing the child within

Embracing the pain

Firm and steadfast arms

Holding each other


Warm, welcoming, accepting

Digging through layers of pain..

Healing


The child within that never was embraced

The arms that held her all wanted something

Wanted and needed love

Always conditional love
This unconscious wanting and desiring

Not truly accepting you for the one you are

Wanting you to give love.


Held by accepting arms

Non demanding touching embrace.

Unconditionally loved

Taken cared by Existence

Fully accepted. fully loved

All accepting Embrace by Existence


Simplicity. Spontaneity

Facades are dropped.

An honest meeting between two open hearts.

A deep meeting Takes place.

Poem, Deep pain

A poem that I started to write in the midst of strong emotional pain that lasted for some hours. I haven't felt this for some months and there really isn't anything in my life right now that is causing it;
but I felt it many times in the past (being bullied, conflicts in relationships, etc.), and something triggered some unresolved emotional pain from the past. In this poem I am digging deep to try to find the root cause - the real cause of this deep unresolved pain - which really doesn't have to do with anyone or anything on the outside.:


Welcome doubts

Doubts of where to be

Doubts of if I am safe


Am I at the right place

Am I welcomed

Can I trust.

Can I be


Is there a place for me called Home?

How does it look like?

Are my expectations fooling me

What is this mistrust

Am I mistrusting myself?

Am I mistrusting life?


This searching for love

Searching for life

Searching for Home

Restlessness

Feeling of not belonging.

This feeling felt many times.

At work

Get-togethers

Religious groups.

Family. Friends.



What triggers it?
This insecurity?
This fear and mistrust of others, of life?


Swimming deep in this sea of insecurities, doubts and mistrust.
Events that triggers this.
A deep subconscious feeling.
Feeling of being rejected.
Feeling of not being cared for.
Of being hurt.
A big sea of past hurts and traumas.


Shifting from contentment.
To a black hole.
Hard to know where others are.


Do they care.
Do they love.
Can I trust.
Do they care for me in my sea
Of heaviness and mistrust.


Is there patience to let it be.
Until it disolves.
Until it connects.
Until it flows over.
Into  the ocean of love.


This protection mechanism.
This dam blocking.
Slowly, slowly, it is losings its power.
Slowly the dam is perforated
When I can just be with it.
Be with all feelings without judging them.
Be with all that is within me without any judgment.


When I let the hidden, unwelcomed parts
To connect with the Big, Ever-Welcoming
Ever deeply-accepting Ocean of Love and Acceptance.


A hug.
A warm embrace.
Intimacy. Closeness.
Words, body contact.
Just being.
Just letting the feelings of hurt be without any judgment.
Evening passes. Feelings shift.


Feelings come and go like waves in the deep blue ocean.
The Deep Blue Ocean of Love embraces it All.
And pushes no one away.
It is One with All.
Fully united.
There is No Separation.
Only Love and Acceptance.

Poem, Meeting Existence in the shower

This longing in my heart that two should become one.
As warm water pour down my skin.
Warming up my cold body.
Deep embracing Love in a Meeting.
Pouring down and saturating my soul.

All in my solitude and suddenly this Meeting with Existence takes place.
So beauiful when drops fall in the water of the ground.
Making ripples in the light-reflection of the puddle.
So ordinary, but so extraordinary.
Brings my full attention.
Fully enjoying the Moment.
Not desiring anything else.

Poem, Letting doubts melt by the warm fire.

Oh these doubts
Surfacing again and again
What do they want to tell?
That I am not trusting life?
Am I afraid of being rejected?
Afraid of failing?
Of not being good enough?
Listening to my heart beating
Feeling the feelings
Hearing the doubts knocking on the door of my heart for attention.
They want a place in the Holy, Sacred place.
By the warm, burning fire.

Sitting by the warm Still fire of Presence.
Fire of Full Acceptance to Life
Letting it warm and open up my heart.
Letting the heat melt all attachments.
Attachments to doubts.
And other deep-rooted structures.

Resting in front of the fire.
Effortlessly sitting and Being
Doubts are still here.
Worries are still here.
Embraced by the Fire of Embracing Stillness and Love.
They lose their strong grip.
And now I feel at Peace.
I experience the Soul at Rest.
Like it always is when I am not caught up in a stressful story.

/Anders Branderud

Poem, Be like a piano

This beauty
Just go deep within.
Be still like a piano.
Be completely open.
A vessel of the Master-Composer
To express the beautiful melody.
One tone after another tone

Be in the Moment
Embrace it all in trust
Be in the Flow
Grounded to the earth
Be your true self.
A harmonious instrument.
Part of the divine play.
Just play along.
In this beautiful song.

Poem, Birds twittering

Wonderful birds twittering
I have heard their soft voices before
Reminding us just to be
Observing the beauty in midst of all stress and problems
Stillness is calling
Stillness is waiting

Poem, Diving Deeper

Diving deeper
Touching depths never explored before
Deep blue sea
Diving towards ground
Ground of Being

Been snorkling all my Life
Afraid to Explore
The depths of Who I am
Of what Life is
Learning to Swim with the Flow
Like a fish
All natural
Fully absorbed in the Moment
Letting the Flow of Existence guide me
It is so easy when embracing the Now
Going deeper and deeper
Deep calling to deep.

Flow dragging me into the depths of this.
Deep blue ocean
Going deeper and deeper
Into my Heart
Into the Heart of Life
Into this Deep Mystery
Vibrant Pulsating Heartbeats of Life
Feeling Grounded
Feeling trust
Feeling so completely Here
Feeling Love
Feeling so Nourished and Saturated
In this ever moving pulsating Flow

Poem, Hugged by Existence

Hugged by Existence
Looking into Her Eyes
Sinking Deeper and Deeper
Worries melt away as heart
Is melting into her heart.
Identities drop away as eyes go deeper and deeper
Sinking into a deep blue sea of love

Whose eyes is it?
It just loses its significance.
In this deep meeting.
In this deep heartfelt connection.

Boundaries melt away.
The dissolve.
As eyes melt into eyes
Heart melts into heart.
Two melt into One.
Illusion of separation
Melts into Reality of Unity
Heart feels so vibrantly alive
When relaxed into the truth
And stillness of the Present Moment.

Instead of Egoic Conflicts
Unconditional Love
Instead of possessing one another
Freedom
Letting go

Every meeting a New Moment
Without requirements, expectations and fàcades
Instead of constantly searching, and the occasional temporary joy of finding what you are desiring.
The Serenity of accepting what Existence provides you.
Unconditional Love
In Every Moment
Regardless of what persons, objects or situations that appear on your Path.

Love-Life
Expressing Herself
Not concerned about Identities
Eye color and other facades
When identities are dropped
A truly, deep and authentic meeting takes place.

Poem, Do you love me.

Self
Do you Love me
In my insecurities
In my pain
In my longing to be whole

Everything is just a reflection
Of what you feel Inside
A reflection in the Deep Blue Ocean.
Ocean of Stillness
Ocean of Deep Embracing Love

Feeling so vulnerable
So open to be formed by Existence
Open for the warmth of the Ocean to grind the stones into jewels
To dig deeper
To see what is awaiting.
To sink deeper into this Endless Love
To fall through the many layers of protection that the ego has created throughout life.
Into the Very Core of Undistorted Perception
Experiencing Existence Afresh
Always New
Always Now
And not through a distorted lens.

Poem, Forest path

As I walk upon the forest path.
Autumn leaves spread out in a thick layer.
Yellow, orange, brown, a colorful mixture.
This path
Where does it take me?
I can see a bit ahead.
But I don't know what is waiting for me.

In this magical forest
This mystery called life
I take one step
I take another step
Effortlessly my legs are moving.

Sometimes there are uphills
Some more effort is required.
It can feel wearisome, heavy.
Some old attachments come up to surface.
Wants my attention.
Tries to take me focus away from this Current Step.

From the beautiful Forest.
From the wonderous leafs.
The pleasant twittering of birds.
The cold breeze.
The fresh autumn smell.
The wonders of the Present Moment.
The aliveness of my body.
The shifting colours of Life.

Suddenly I identify with the uphills.
I forget who I truly am.
I get so attached to the uphills.
I forget that there is no problem in this very Moment.

I get reminded.
Then I go deep within.
I breath deeply.
I focus on the Current Step.
When I just accept the current inner and outer surroundings of the
Path that Existence is leading me on.
That I can just walk step by step.
Without worrying about where this Path will lead me.
Trusting Existence.
That She will keep me safe.
That all is Perfectly Well.

Anders Branderud [More poems: http://stillnesspoems.blogspot.com/ ]

Poem, Do we have to judge each other?

Do we have to judge each other?
Try to figure each other out?
Like we are some static, predictable persons?
Or can we just meet without judgments?
Relate without mental ideas of each other?

Just meet in the Now
In the Present Moment.
Hug. Talk. Have eye-contact. Laugh. Tickle. Cry.
Connect. Be quiet.
Flow together.
And experience this myster called life.
This ever-renewing Moment.
To see Life afresh.
Like a child.
Fascinated by every movement.
And every Moment.

A heart beating.
A bird twittering.
Eyes meeting and making contact.
Sandness of eyes.
A wonderful meeting.
Laughter.
Smiling.
A leaf on the ground.

Grounded with the Heart
Existence is never boring or bad.
Only our filtering of existence seen through a past and future-lens.

All so ordinary
But all so extraordinary
When you clean your glasses from judgments and attachments.
Then life flows unfiltered right through the glasses and your eyes.
Pulsating through your body.
Energy moving freely.
Connected to your heart.
Free from everything that distorted your perception.
And suddenly a realization.
All is perfect.

Ugly turns into beautiful.
Struggles turn into opportunities.
A no to life turns into a yes to life.
When ou leave your overloaded bag of attachments.
And replace it with the light bag of The Present Moment.

Poem, Divine play

This beauty
Just go deep within.
Be still like a piano.
Be completely open.
A vessel for the Master-composer.
To express the beautiful melody.

One tone
Another tone.
Be in the Moment.
Embrace it all in trust.
Be in the flow.
Be your true self.
A harmonious instrument.
Part of a divine Play.
Just play along.
Embrace the song.

Poem, A master piece of art.

Life
This Beautiful Magical Mystery
Dancing Flow
Vivid colors
Uniting
Dancing
Blending into a magnificent diversity
A master piece of art.
A dynamic fullness of Life

Everyone different
Like different colors of a painting
But in essence
Only One
Spontaneously expressing their uniqueness.
Combined into various forms and shapes.

Single beautiful strokes.
Even more beautiful when they unite and flow together.
All beautiful regardless of whether they are aware or not of their beauty.
Or whether they judge each other, and themselves or not.

"I want to be blue"
"I want to be orange"
Rest in being a unique and wonderful expression of Consciousness
A perfect expression of a flawless painting

And be all absorbed in the Now
Let your life flow.
As a stroke of a brush.
Spontaneously flowing on the drawing.
Totally absorbed in the flow of being.

Stroke by stroke.
Moment by moment.
Movement by movement

Poem, Furnace of burning fires

Furnace of burning fires

Flames of stillness

Burn up your attachements and desires

Let it all be consumed by the flames

Purging your heart

Of all the layers that hinder the heart from pumping freely.


Deeply touching stillness

Heartfelt gratitude of life

Deep calling deep

Poem, Arms wide open

Touching love

Deep meeting

Holding hands

Expressing love

So accepting

So warm


Warming up a heart

That once was frozen

And Now vibrates

So alive

So full of energy

So engaged in this mystery

Called Life

So fully enjoying the Now


Going deeper into this warm embracing stillness

Going deeper into this deep connection

So touched by this closeness

Heartfulness

Beauty


Heart opens more, and more and more

Until the door is all wide open.

Open for everything that Life has to offer.

Heart wide open

Feeling all that Life brings.

Eyes wide open

Not hiding for Existence.

Ears wide open

Listening to the quite voice of Stillness

Nose wide open

Sensitive to all Wonders of Life

Mouth wide open

To all the tastes that Life brings,,sweet and sour


Widely embracing Life

A big Yes to Life

All embracing every flavour that Life expresses itself in

with Arms wide open

Come as you are

Come as you are.

Broken
Hurt
Unworthy
Angry

Everyone is welcome to this feast
To partake of this beautiful stillness
The delicious dishes that Life offers

Always new tastes
Everything is all new and all refreshing
When it is partaken of in this Moment

You are invited
There are no qualifications
No need to perform
Your past doesn't matter

It only takes a willingness
To give it all to Life

To not eat the bredacrumbs of yesterdays' feast
Not to dream about a exquisite feast in the future

Delight in the feast of the moment
Celebrate it moment by moment 

/Anders Branderud

Aching, vulnerable heart

This aching heart

Covered under so many layers after years of suffering

Being the slave under the whims of the ego

Layers of protection

Layers of hardening

Layers of no to life

Insecurity is triggered

Pain of feeling hurt

Feeling rejected

Rejected by life

Diving into this pain

Forgetting the ego story of not being good enough

Opening up

Being completely vulnerable

Feeling the deep stillness coming

Embracing the wounded heart

Embracing the pain in the chest

This healing embrace

Healing sensitive touch

Embracing the wounded child within

Deep healing meeting

Heart wide open

So touched by Life

Heart is brought to life again

Vibrantly beating Moment after Moment

Heartbeat after heartbeat

Life never rejected me

It was my ego rejecting life

Life is ever just waiting

Like a loving mother

To embrace the wounds of the heart

And to lovingly hold you as the wounds fall off one after another

Until the heart is all wide open

Saying Yes to every Moment

Saying Yes to every Movement

Embracing a 'No to life'

Good morning
Oh this heavy feeling
What is it?
This no to life
Can it be embraced
Can I care for it
Can it be loved
What is this feeling in my body
In my chest
Based on the thought that something is wrong
That I did something wrong
That I will not manage to do what I am supposed to do today

Leave the past
Leave the future in the hands of existence
Embrace the Now
Now.

I have met you before
You are a frequent guest
Sort of unwelcomed
But you come anyways
Most of my life I tried to push you away
Positive thinking
Suppressing you
Not wanting to tell of you to others

Now
Lets be silent
Be with you in silence
Some heaviness
Just feel it
And let it be
Just be with the waves
They have something to teach you
Listen to the feelings
Let them smash at you
Like a cliff
Completely open and vulnerable to the waves of life
Not making any effort to run a way
Still And sensitive
Open to get grinded and formed by movements of existence

Still here
You have not left me
Stillness, Still you are here
In the midst of all dark, gloomy waves
You whisper in my ear
Be still
I will never abandon you
I am one with you
We are never divided
Always whole
You are fully embraced in unity with existence
Feeling this stillness
Diving deeper

Letting all waves come
Gently, smooth waves
Heavy, smashing waves
Seemingly overwhelming waves
Listening
Feeling the same stillness is always there
In the depths of Heart
Warmly embracing every expression
Every wave regardless of form
This old habitual No to life
Once again transformed into a Yes to Life.
This mystery of accepting Life as it is.

Feel the hearbeat

Silence of the heart

Heart calling you beat by beat

Moment by moment

Listen to her calling you

Listen to her soft, tender, gentle voice

Calling you

Deeper and deeper inside


Feel the rhythm

Feel the movements

Feel the Moment

Just relax

Be here

Be still

And know That I am

Poem, Tree of life

Tree of life
Giving fruits
Fruits of stillness
Fruits of peace
Beautiful stillness
Generously ever providing it's fruits
Seasons come and go
life flow
Embrace the tree
Take shade under her branches 
Let her ever provide you with her fruits
Forever provide for you, shade you, and nourish you
Open your heart
The season may be doubts, worries or other attachments 
Just relax, and life will provide everything for you
Life is all Perfect in each and every season.

Poem, chit-chat

Chit chat
Chit chat
This empty talk
Meeting
Silence
What should I say
Should I say anything

Mind running around.
Playing it's games

Let's be real
Let's stop the game
Let's meet
Be authentic
What is on your heart.
What do you like to talk about the most
What touches your heart.

I am not good at chit chat
Maybe I don't feel real

Let's be authentic
Stop worry about what others will think or say.
Let's truly meet
At each and every heartbeat..
Let the expression flow
Naturally
Just talk from your heart, not from a facade
Just be

Poem, Rivers of life

This is so touching
This meeting
Connecting heart to heart
Very deeply, very intimatly

This stillness is like this gravity force
Pulling me deeper, deeper inside
So very touched
So attracted
So touched deep within
So deeply connected
This deeply touching meeting
This deeply looking into the eyes

Essence uniting with itself
Eyes connect
Hearts connect
So deeply.
So profoundly.
This vibrant aliveness
Profound Love

Stillness pulls me
Stillness guides me

Oh this depth

Heart calling out from the depth of her being
Expressing her gratitude for being
For being a vessel of Life
For the rivers of never ending living water
existence tells You:

Come to me if you thirst.
Drink me
And this stream will bubble up in your stomach
It will just stream through all your body.
Stream of refreshing peace and Love
Forever anew, moment by moment.

It will lead you deeper, and deeper, and deeper and deeper.

Deep into silence
Deep into the wonders of life.
Silence of Heart
Silence of Being
Silence of truly seeing
Existence for what it is
Silence calls you
Softly, gently

May your ears be attentive to her soft and still voice
Listen, and join her in Stillness

She calls you into this place
Where attachments drops
Where this true connection can takes place.
Where the ego loses its power
Outpowered by this unconditional, All embracing
Deeply touching love.

Poem, Will never abandon you

Stillness, ease
Beautiful peace
 Quietness,.solitude
Heartfully embraced by existence.
Lying here..
Grateful for life.
Perfect moment.
Free of attachments.
Free to live.
Free to love.
FREE to embrace Life.
Hugging existence.
loving what is
forever.
Always Here.
Will never abandon you.

Poem, A touching hug

What is this attachment?
What do I really want?
I just want to live..
Just want to be real
Moment  by Moment
Movement By Movement
Meetings, Moments..
All the Time
All part of this beautiful orchestra

This beautiful Harmony
If I live in an attachment
If I am somewhere else.
Then I miss the divine play.
This divine orchestra.

A Hug.
A very touching Hug
Another Touching Hug.
Moment by Moment
So touching when it is fully lived and experienced.

So am I fully Here?
Or do I drift away to somewhere far away in a distant land.
The dream land of how I dream that life should unfold
Or do I just dare to be real.
To constantly be Here in every single Moment.
To dare to be real and to feel in every Moment.
To Truly Meet.
To be fully aware in each Meeting
To actively Connect Heart to Heart
Soul to Soul.

This attachment is trying to grab me.
To hold me.
To make me live life in a way that is not authentic.
It makes me more uncomfortable.
Things that should have been said are avoided...

Poem, Searching and Finding

Beautiful beauty
Wondrous wonder
Playful play
Flowful flow
Still silence

Gratitude to life
All this searching
In religion
Travelling all over the world
Israel, Taiwan, USA
Looking for wholeness, truth, God
Love relationships
Broken heart
Broken hope
Failure after failure
Longing for heaven in midst of all pressures, unfulfilment and stress

Moments of Stillness
Moment of Connecting
Moments of Reality, of Deep Meetings
Yet to be followed by more searching and confusion.

Existence leading me out of this mess
Showing that my way is not the Real way.
Gently breaking all my hopes
Showing that the God I worshiped was just the product
of human facades and ego
A replacement for facing the real Existence/Reality
The God that isn't divided, but One with All.
That the relations I was in were a selfish love-affair
of two strong egos manipulating to get their will
Mixed with occasional short authentic true Meetings

Allowing Existence to lead my Path
Searching, searching, searching
Giving up the search.
Finding, finding, finding
This deep stillness was Always Here
Hiding behind the ego
Hiding in fully Embracing the Present Moment.
More poems:  http://stillnesspoems.blogspot.com

Poem, Longing of meeting and connecting

Feelings of jealousy
Feelings of being envious
Feelings of missed opportunities
Attachments and fears
This longing to meet.
Yet this thing, this fear, this insecurity, that I let block the meeting.
Getting stuck in some facade.
So in some way this longing to meet gets in the way of a True Meeting.
This attachment is in the way of a real flow.

This deeply felt longing of Meeting, of Connecting with a certain person..
Is it just a facade? Just based on attachments?

Lets meet
Lets get back.
There is only, always, only, the Now.
The Now is Now.
Lets live in the Now instead of dream world that doesn't exist.
Lets connect deeply.
Stop pretending
Just Live
And live it fully.. So fully you forget about time, attachments and problems.
Just let it embrace you fully.

Hearticulate your feelings.
Dear Heart- speak up
Open up to the rivers of existence
To this Never Ending flow of letting go of attachments, fears, hopes and desires.
Just Flow and Be from This Place of Deep Acceptance
Happy in the Now in the midst of the deep, stormy, frightening ocean.
Flow beloved heart, flow
Embrace your low, and you will flow.

Sometimes it is like you have this big endless reservoirs full of living, flowing water
But your attachments is blocking this flow from coming out.
This fresh, Infinite, Endless Source just holding it back.
From Expressing Your Unique Tone
Your Unique Flow of Creativity
Your Unique Unconditional Love-expression
This block hinders the meeting.
So you get a rigid meeting instead of a deeply, refreshing and flowing meeting.
Your insecurity is blocking This True Expression.
And yet some refreshing drops of the Flow may go through the block and refresh the Meeting.

Just flow. Just express your insecurity.
Being and expressing what you feel
Embracing it..Loving it.
And in this Place of Acceptance
Let your insecurity transform into Peace
Let your despair transform into Happiness.
Let your problems dissolve into the Wonder of Being.
Live and Let go.
Embrace the Never-ending and ever-flowing Flow

Poem, What do I fear?

So really what do I fear
What is it that I don't dare.
What is holding me back?
Am I afraid of a tear
Of going to Near
Of Closeness to what is Dear
Is it time to switch gear
To embrace all the fear.
What structure is holding me back?
Is there some fear of lack?
Am I trying to persevere
Am I just missing Life
by my fear of missing Life

And now in the midst of my attachment
in the midst of all insecurity
all drama
In This embrace of everything that appears
I feel This Flow
and the Words flows....
And Life flows.
Stillness embraces it All.

I have been here before.
I recognize the terrain.
This structure, this texture.
This mountain...
Mountain of insecurity.
Valley of attachments
Lake of fear.
And in midst of all this there is
Perfect Path of Truth
Path of Peaceful Stillness
Where you have to be Fully Aware
Step by Step
Moment by Moment
So you don't lose Sight
And fall of this narrow Path of Truth

If you look back or forward, you may get stuck in attachments, lose your balance and fall of.
This Path is Always there.
And it doesn't matter how deep down you are in the valleys of attachments to problems
How deep down you have sunken into the quicksand.
How far away you seem to be from the Path of the Now, the Path of Deep Serenity.
The Moment you dare to Embrace and Accept what you feel right now without any resistance.
In this Moment you are Free
In this Moment you are once again up at the Path of Peaceful Serenity
The Path of Blissful and Fully Pervading Peace

Just continue to walk, my child.
And tirelessly get back to the Path every time you fall off.
Never give up
Just embrace Life, again, and again, and again.
And the more you embrace Life
The more Life will open Your heart.
And will lead you deeper and deeper into this deep peaceful Flow
Deep into reality.
Deep into this exciting, exploring
Ever-opening
Ever-deepening
Ever-widening
Wondrous adventure
Peaceful mystery

Poem, sensitvity

So Sensitive, so gentle
Just like Life
Gently listening to what we really, really want.
Whispering in our ear
Waiting for listening to happen,
So that heart can meet heart
And the inner heart-voice can be heard
I love you my child.
Please stay connected.
You don't have to chase any bliss-moments
Every Moment can be a deep, heartful and peaceful connection.
Just stop creating this mental noise though all structure-identifications
Relax. and Be.
Now

Poem, So touched by this closeness

So touched by this closeness
This eye contact
This smile contact
Heart contact
Being relating to Being
Closeness, deep heartedness
Deep inner meeting
This warming hug
Heart-embracing touch
Beauty from within
Vividly and silently expressed
In this silent, embracing meeting
This love
Feeling of intervoweness
Beautiful and quiet expressions of gratitude

"Thanks for asking how I am, despite that we don't know each other"
This deep interrelating is timeless
This interrelating without memories, projections and facades.
You can "know" someone for a lifetime, yet this true meeting is true knowing - immensely more deeper than an ordinary life long relation between two egos.
This truly Momentary touching, heartfelt soul-connection
This meeting touched me
It truly touched me
Thank you
Heartfelt gratitude pouring out from the depths of my innermost being.
Thankful to Existence of bringing people with whom you can deeply connect
Out of the depths of heartitude comes this gratitude
So thankful for this sincerity, realness, authenticity, caring heartfulness
Embracing, loving, warming, touching meeting
Careful not to stick, and to get attached, and to miss that in Every Moment
existence wants to tightly embrace you,
to be all united with Life
Closely connected
Full of life this true meeting without desires
This warm embrace without requirements
This loving touch is so, so, so touching.
This intimacy. heart connecting to heart.

Poem, Stillness, living waters

Embrace Life Now
Fully Here and Now
day after day
Moment after Moment
Listen to your heart.
Let her guide you
In the valleys of uncertaintities
In the midst of mountains of dreams and hopes...

Let it lead you the crevices of Stillness
Let her nourish you with Living Waters
Let her guide you to the green meadows of serenity

Poem, jealousy

Jealousy

Two persons are kissing

This feeling of 'being in love' to one of one persons.
This attachment that has some grip.

But is this really Reality.

Who are kissing?

Who is jealous?

Who is in love?

Back to the Moment

What is going on here.

Listening to my heartbeat

Hearing kissing

Another kiss

Feeling peace

Feeling stillness

Perhaps some jealousy.

Sound of a touching breath

Feeling the in-breath

Feeling the out-breath

Hearing a content sigh

Intimate depth

A deep, heartfelt talk

A thought arises that I want to experience the same

Another thought arises: Acccept the Moment as it is

Embrace the Moment.

Take what Life gives you.

This Stillness is perfect

So Content of what Life has to offer

This Wonderful never-ending flow

Just embrace it fully

In its vividness, in its Aliveness, in its Wonder

Thankful for all that Life gives

How it guides itself, sets up situations to expose rusty, old structures

Gives the opportunity to return to stillness

Poem, Stilness is my name

Stillness is my name

The heart is my Abode

Stay with me

Listen to my voice

Calling you out of your maze

Out of your dark secrets

Your identifications and ego

Flow

Just be

Just watch

Everything passes by

Clouds on the sky

All various forms

Smoothly and effortlessly
They move on the sky

The sun is Always Shining

And suddenly the sky opens up

The clouds are drifting away

No attachments and no ego are clouding the sun
Life just is

The present Moment

An Open Sky

Nothing blocking the Stillness

Connected to the Source

So, so close to Life and the Present Moment

Attachments just doesn't matter

Life just is
There is Only Now

This ever touching Now

Poem, Finding the Stillness within

Oh, this deep stillness
This deep invitation to go deeper and deeper
Silence, beautiful invitation
Come, my child
be still
just be with me in silence
just be still and free
deep breath
another deep breath
beauty of this moment
relaxation
stillness
overflowing in dancing
in poetry
in deep heartfelt connection..
oh, this gratitude to just be here and sit
this is the Moment
everything is perfect
no desires for something else...

"but I still havent found what I am looking for"
turns into finding when the Moment is embraced exactly as it is
just relaxing
laughter comes spontaneously..........................
beautiful rose
planted in beautiful silence
nourished by stillness
watered by deep connection
forever still
forever content
by its simple, worrisome existence
its stillness is soo touching

So impersonal, but yet so personal and touching
always inviting
everyone to wake up
to leave all attachments and return to the roots
To the Source
To this Wonderful Stillness
where Life flows like a river
where you turns into an expression of art
An invitation to stillness
A testimony of truth, of Reality, of the hidden Beauty of life.
An open and warm invitation to all of humanity
To Return and Embrace the True Self
To stop pretending, to stop being part of this drama
To return to Being

And in this Being
There is a Spontaneous, authentic and true expression
Love and peace that flows naturally out of the river
When this Flow of Life is allowed
The dam starts to break
And eventually this flow starts to perforate the most elaborate structure of attachments, doubts, worries and ego structures
More and more flow and stillness is experienced
and then suddenly the dam breaks completely.
Allowing the Flow of Life to flow completely freely.